I was shamed on Facebook for taking my child to a childless wedding

A 19-year-old mother said she brought her two-year-old daughter, Amelia, to her childless friend’s wedding and was taken aback by the groom’s mother’s comments.

“Just a little background: last year, I was asked to be a bridesmaid in a family friend’s wedding. I was thrilled and immediately said yes, even though it was a child-free event. I had arranged for a nanny, but about a week before the wedding, she informed me that she would no longer be in town and could not watch my daughter,” she said on Reddit.

On short notice, she approached the bride and asked if she could bring Amelia to the wedding since she didn’t have time to find another trusted babysitter.

She says her daughter is “generally a very calm baby – she’s comfortable with people and happy as long as she’s fed”.

“The bride knew this as she had seen my daughter many times before, and she happily agreed, saying that having Amelia there would make the wedding photos even more special,” the mom explained.

In-laws “outraged” by teenager’s move

Cut to the day and the wedding was going smoothly, although the mother said she noticed “a few looks” from the groom’s parents.

“Amelia stayed with my sisters most of the day, but during the reception I took her with me to congratulate the couple,” she continued. “As I approached with Amelia in my arms, the groom’s mother suddenly commented: ‘You shouldn’t have brought a child to a childless wedding, especially when she doesn’t fit the family.’

“I was completely surprised. For context, my daughter is mixed – I’m half white and half Hispanic and her dad is black. I’ve been called ‘white’ because I’m out of touch with my Hispanic family, so I knew exactly what he meant when he said my daughter didn’t ‘fit in with the family.’

“The bride looked shocked and the groom immediately got up and pushed his parents away. Taking this as my cue, I decided it was time to leave. I went around to say hello to everyone and put Amelia in her stroller. As I was leaving, the daughter-in-law came to apologize for her father-in-law’s behavior. I was upset, but I knew it wasn’t her fault, so I just wished her luck and left.”

Now, about a week after the wedding, the OP was tagged in a Facebook post by the groom’s mother. The post read: “I’m outraged that my grandchildren weren’t allowed at this event, but when a teenage mother who couldn’t be responsible enough to leave her child with her father brings her child, it’s great. “

To make matters worse, she has also told family members that the OP was lying about what she said about her daughter’s appearance.

“You are wrong”

Some people in the comments agreed that the father-in-law was terrible, but others believed that the OP put the daughter-in-law in a tricky position once she asked her for an exception to her rule.

One person said: “When you make the call for a childless marriage, everyone has to make the sacrifice. The bride and groom should not have made you an exception. Amelia should have stayed with your sister away from the wedding. And the groom’s parents just suck it up in every possible way.”

Another person called out: “The bride said it was okay. The groom has apparently agreed based on the fact that he got his parents out of the situation. Those are the *only* two people who get the floor.”

A third Redditor responded: “You’re wrong, especially since you put the bride on the spot by asking her.”

“It is your duty to find a babysitter or not go to events without children. You asked the bride and she said yes, but you should never have made your child take care of someone else’s problem. Taking only one child to a child-free event makes everyone who didn’t bring children wonder why that baby is here, but not mine. If you had better manners you would know this and where was the father of this child?” someone else wrote.

And another concluded: “It was not the mother of the groom’s place to decide who could and could not attend. Given the mean thing she said that day and the drama she’s so determined to stir up online, it’s pretty clear that the mother of the groom is the TA in this situation. You did your best in a difficult situation. She, on the other hand, seems to be able to do her worst.”